Anxiety is a mental health issue we all struggle with from time to time. For some of us, it’s a constant, everyday struggle and for others, we develop feelings of anxiety within a certain context, such as in crowds, when having to deliver a public speech or in hospitals.
I recently researched some coping mechanisms to help combat anxiety and came across the NHS website, which promoted all of the obvious solutions: a good sleep, a balanced diet and sufficient exercise. All of these factors of course contribute to a healthy lifestyle, both physically and mentally, but I started to wonder if there was something I could do in the heat of the moment to suppress my anxious thoughts. I decided to devise a list of everyday tips I’ve found to be helpful in controlling my anxious thoughts in the hope that they may also be helpful to others.
I recently researched some coping mechanisms to help combat anxiety and came across the NHS website, which promoted all of the obvious solutions: a good sleep, a balanced diet and sufficient exercise. All of these factors of course contribute to a healthy lifestyle, both physically and mentally, but I started to wonder if there was something I could do in the heat of the moment to suppress my anxious thoughts. I decided to devise a list of everyday tips I’ve found to be helpful in controlling my anxious thoughts in the hope that they may also be helpful to others.
I’ve found that creating lists has been helpful to me in a number of ways. For example, when passing a group of people I feel anxious around, I start to make lists in my head. Some people say that imagining the subject you’re anxious about is naked can be helpful, but for me, I’ve found that focusing on what is making me anxious only heightens those emotions, and so I started focusing on something else, such as my shopping list or a to do list for the day. I’ve found that preoccupying my mind in such a way subsequently calms my nerves and allows me to overcome that brief moment of anxiety.
I’ve also taken to making to do lists and checked off things I’ve achieved. This is important to be personal to you and include achievable goals such as getting breakfast, washing your hair or going for a walk, as well as long term, ambitious goals to give you something to work towards. The everyday goals generate a sense of achievement as you check that they’ve been completed whereas the long term will give you a future to focus on achieveing. I’ve also found it helpful to make separate lists to document steps needed to take in order to achieve more long term goals to make them more realistic and achievable. Creating such lists gives you back the control of your life and something else to focus on and strive towards. I’ve found a lot of my anxiety develops from a lack of self-accomplishment and low self-esteem, so documenting your achievements in such a way promotes positive thinking and will hopefully limit the anxiety surrounding your future.
I’ve also found that making lists of things I’m grateful for allows me to focus on the positive aspects of my life and gives me the motivation to overcome negative thoughts, including anxiety. You can do this on your phone or in a notebook to carry on your person for accessibility to reinforce that idea whenever you need an extra boost.
I’ve also taken to making to do lists and checked off things I’ve achieved. This is important to be personal to you and include achievable goals such as getting breakfast, washing your hair or going for a walk, as well as long term, ambitious goals to give you something to work towards. The everyday goals generate a sense of achievement as you check that they’ve been completed whereas the long term will give you a future to focus on achieveing. I’ve also found it helpful to make separate lists to document steps needed to take in order to achieve more long term goals to make them more realistic and achievable. Creating such lists gives you back the control of your life and something else to focus on and strive towards. I’ve found a lot of my anxiety develops from a lack of self-accomplishment and low self-esteem, so documenting your achievements in such a way promotes positive thinking and will hopefully limit the anxiety surrounding your future.
I’ve also found that making lists of things I’m grateful for allows me to focus on the positive aspects of my life and gives me the motivation to overcome negative thoughts, including anxiety. You can do this on your phone or in a notebook to carry on your person for accessibility to reinforce that idea whenever you need an extra boost.
I understand that a lot of anxiety is based on our social relationships with others, and in suggesting you push yourself to be more social, I’m not saying you should necessarily go out of your comfort zone. However, I’ve found that being more social can counteract anxious thoughts and create a sense of achievement. By this, I don’t mean become a social butterfly if that’s not someone you are, but embracing what you fear the most can help counteract negative feelings and connotations towards a certain aspect of your life you feel anxious about.
I suggest making lunch plans with a trusted friend or visiting family you’re comfortable around. Don’t be ashamed to admit that being sociable is difficult for you at times. People that love you and support you will understand and try to make things easier for you. For instance, you could meet in a restaurant you’re familiar with and enjoy or limit the amount of time you spend being social. Implemented boundaries will make this particular goal much more achievable and gives those closest to you a greater understanding of who you are. You can even progressively extend those boundaries by testing out a new place to meet or expanding the amount of time you spend in company.
In extreme cases, or just for a general boost of social achievement, I suggest making use of social media. Set yourself a goal to like a certain amount of pictures/status’ and comment on a certain amount of things. Being nice costs nothing so don’t be afraid to tell that girl you like her outfit or compliment a boy on his new hair cut. Text that friend you’ve been meaning to contact and you gain that sense of being sociable without even having to leave the house.
I’ve also found that being around confident people often has the ability to suppress anxiety. It can be quite draining for someone with high levels of anxiety to be around someone who exerts so much confidence, but it is only human nature to adapt ourselves to those around us. You may feel less uneasy around someone who appears to be confident as opposed to someone who is openly equally as anxious. It’s like you’re almost pretending to not be anxious, and in the process, you may find that you don’t actually feel anxious at all. Attracting that confident energy may be the key to exerting your own confidence in many situations. In other words, fake it til you make it. However, don’t be ashamed to admit when you don’t feel so confident. Even the most confident person in the world gets anxious at times, and speaking to people you trust and are comfortable around can definitely help.
I suggest making lunch plans with a trusted friend or visiting family you’re comfortable around. Don’t be ashamed to admit that being sociable is difficult for you at times. People that love you and support you will understand and try to make things easier for you. For instance, you could meet in a restaurant you’re familiar with and enjoy or limit the amount of time you spend being social. Implemented boundaries will make this particular goal much more achievable and gives those closest to you a greater understanding of who you are. You can even progressively extend those boundaries by testing out a new place to meet or expanding the amount of time you spend in company.
In extreme cases, or just for a general boost of social achievement, I suggest making use of social media. Set yourself a goal to like a certain amount of pictures/status’ and comment on a certain amount of things. Being nice costs nothing so don’t be afraid to tell that girl you like her outfit or compliment a boy on his new hair cut. Text that friend you’ve been meaning to contact and you gain that sense of being sociable without even having to leave the house.
I’ve also found that being around confident people often has the ability to suppress anxiety. It can be quite draining for someone with high levels of anxiety to be around someone who exerts so much confidence, but it is only human nature to adapt ourselves to those around us. You may feel less uneasy around someone who appears to be confident as opposed to someone who is openly equally as anxious. It’s like you’re almost pretending to not be anxious, and in the process, you may find that you don’t actually feel anxious at all. Attracting that confident energy may be the key to exerting your own confidence in many situations. In other words, fake it til you make it. However, don’t be ashamed to admit when you don’t feel so confident. Even the most confident person in the world gets anxious at times, and speaking to people you trust and are comfortable around can definitely help.
Dealing with anxiety is all about taking back the control and having the power to overcome it. Planning your time and developing a personal schedule is an excellent way of taking the control of your life back.
I think it can be important to have a routine, but also schedule in non-routine activities. No one can plan their entire lives, but being aware of time you have to do things unplanned, like visiting a friend on your day off or having a pamper, keeps you in control without being too much of a control freak. It’s important to maintain a balance of spontaneity and routine, but of course the ratios of these are completely personal to you. You may find you like to have more control of what you’re doing from day to day whereas others may feel restricted in planning their activities. Whatever your preference, being aware of how you spend your time gives you back the control of your own life.
I think it can be important to have a routine, but also schedule in non-routine activities. No one can plan their entire lives, but being aware of time you have to do things unplanned, like visiting a friend on your day off or having a pamper, keeps you in control without being too much of a control freak. It’s important to maintain a balance of spontaneity and routine, but of course the ratios of these are completely personal to you. You may find you like to have more control of what you’re doing from day to day whereas others may feel restricted in planning their activities. Whatever your preference, being aware of how you spend your time gives you back the control of your own life.
For me, if I’m feeling particularly anxious, I like to tell myself that it’s ‘just another hour and I’ll be home’, ‘another half an hour and I’ll be away from this’ etc. Remind yourself that you may feel nervous or fear something now, but the future is not too far away. My Mum always says ‘what’s the worst that can happen?’ For me, this works best when I’m making a decision without too many consequences. Asking myself that question when I know so many things can go wrong can only spiral into more negative thinking and actually encourage anxiety, but knowing the best outlook to have for yourself in a situation is definitely something I’ve found to help when I’m in a position I know I can’t escape from. You just have to focus on the positive outcomes to eliminate those negative thoughts.
How we deal with anxiety is completely dependent on the context. This little list is just a general overview of what I’ve found to be helpful in controlling my anxious thoughts on a everyday basis, but they can of course be adopted into specific occurrences, such as job interviews, meeting new people, crowds and intimacy.
By all means, this isn’t the answer to everything. Unfortunately, anxiety and other mental health issues continue to be an ongoing issue in the every day lives of society, but I hope that my insight has given others food for thought on how to cope with some of those anxious feelings.
As with any mental health issue, I encourage you to talk to someone you trust. It may not have all of the answers, but knowing that you’re not alone is another stepping stone to overcoming your greatest fears.
By all means, this isn’t the answer to everything. Unfortunately, anxiety and other mental health issues continue to be an ongoing issue in the every day lives of society, but I hope that my insight has given others food for thought on how to cope with some of those anxious feelings.
As with any mental health issue, I encourage you to talk to someone you trust. It may not have all of the answers, but knowing that you’re not alone is another stepping stone to overcoming your greatest fears.