We're all aware of the recent phenomena of Tinder, Grindr, Match.com and other means of dating via social media. In fact, it's become so popular that in 50 years' time, we'll be able to tell the grandkids that 'it all started with a friend request'. You know the scenario: it's instigated by a poke, which leads on to an inbox and pretty soon, you're Skyping. But does this robotic means of dating have an impact on the romantic aspect of courtship in modern society?
Whatever happened to the old-school, idealistic image of a stern looking father sitting on his porch, cradling a shotgun in his lap as he claims that no man will ever be good enough? The trial-and-error style of dating seems to have been replaced with a CV-style list of interests and hobbies. I can't help but feel that this selective method of choosing someone to date almost takes away the fun of the unknown, unless you're into that Christian-Grey-Style of almost employing your lover. But I suppose it is much easier to lie about yourself behind a screen in order to seem more appealing. In fact, according to info.gram, a whopping 81% of online daters lie about their age, height or figure. However, despite all of these carefully selected choices, it seems so common that the intentions of your prospective partner is merely sexual. According to the Daily Mail, that's exactly what a lot of these internet daters are looking for: a bit of casual sex. Some even record such encounters on social media platforms. It seems the iconic notches on the bed posts have been replaced with spreadsheets and charts of sexual relations. Despite all of these claims, I can't help but feel that internet dating is somewhat beneficial to the shy, the busy or the lonely. According to a recent survey carried out by the University of Rochester, the amount of couples who found love over the internet increased from 0.2% in 1978 to 23.2% between 2007 and 2009. According to info.gram, 1 in 5 of us now meet our partners online and a shocking 9.1 million Britons are signed up to some form of online dating, disregarding the 100 million times the Tinder app has been downloaded. According to expandedramblings.com, there are 26 million matches made per day on Tinder, amounting from a staggering 1.4 billion daily swipes. With the average tinder user spending an estimated 35 minutes per day scouring the app for fresh meat, it's no wonder the match statistics are so high. In addition to the augmentation of internet dating, a new technology is on the rise, which is set to take over the sex lives of so many. Sex robot brothels are allegedly set to open in the UK, reducing the demand for actual physical contact with another human being. In addition to this, you can now buy remote-controlled sex toys which are perfect for long distance relationships, but again decrease the demand for the real deal. An openness towards sex has been liberating and the rise of internet dating and a selection of toys have been beneficial to couples worldwide, but at what point do we say enough is enough? When does the robotic relationship replace the real thing? Are emotions and romance really on the brink of extinction?
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In celebration of the nationalistic St George's Day, Labour leader Jeremy Corbyn announced that he would seek to establish four new bank holidays across the UK in the hope of uniting England, Scotland, Wales and Northern Ireland in addition to giving workers a well-deserved break. But I would like to propose a new type of bank holiday: a day wear workers in retail and restaurants are also granted a bank holiday.
Bank holiday weekends are our busiest times of the year, so whilst the 9-5 workers enjoy the extra long weekend, workers in the pub and restaurant industry enjoy extra long, busier shifts. A bank holiday for everyone would be much more beneficial and fair to the population as a whole. His heart is in the right place but those of us slaving away behind a bar or counter on bank holiday weekends deserve a break too. As a side note, I found when reading up on the extra bank holiday proposal that many have predicted a Conservative win. According to Sky News, a Comres poll for the Sunday Mirror revealed that 50% would vote Conservative, only 25% would be supporting Labour, a mere 11% would tick the box for the Liberals and a dwindling 7% would show love for UKIP in the election polls. This genuinely scares me. Following PM Theresa May's shock decision to call a general election, the Observer suggests that the Conservatives have opened up a 19-point lead against Labour. If this pattern continues on Election Day, the Tories are set to have a comfortable win, but I can't help but feel that the pubic have been misinformed. Please remember that a vote for Blue is a vote for the Bedroom Tax, for the Privatisation of Royal Mail, a rise in tuition fees and a reduction in Welfare, including investments in the NHS. A vote for the Conservatives is for a VAT increase, against the mansion tax and against the Human Rights Act. Please don't just read what you have seen about the EU and assume that the Tories will solve all of our immigration policies. There is so much more to it than that. #VoteLabour #Election Day "I don't like that lipstick colour on you."
"Why do you wear so much makeup?" "Why do you have a full face on just to go to the shops?" "You really need to put more makeup on." "You look so different without makeup." "You look tired today." In light of my makeup addiction post, I wanted to write something about the choices people make when it comes to makeup. Whether or not you choose to paint your face with glitter, simply apply a slick of gloss or wear no makeup products at all is entirely up to you. Don't ever let anyone make you feel bad for how you choose to look. Odds are they're probably jealous anyway. I wanted to address specifically people who like to wear a full face of makeup on a regular basis. Some people feel much more comfortable in a second skin as opposed to their own natural face. Some actually prefer the look of overdrawn lips and dramatic eyes. Some throw colour on their face just because they damn well feel like it. All of these reasons to wear makeup are perfectly good explanations, not that you should feel the need to justify yourself. There are so many tips and tricks all over the place to help you achieve what you desire, such as ways to make your eyes look bigger or smaller, colours to make your eyes pop and the best contour shade for your skin tone. These tips are not there to be followed explicitly, although I do enjoy incorporating them into many makeup looks when I'm aiming to achieve a certain appearance. That doesn't mean to say you can't do something you want to that maybe breaks the rules. Wear that bold red others say you can't pull off. Etch your brows in whatever shape you want. Colour your eyelids in whatever shade you please, because you are the only opinion that matters. I'm lucky enough to have a boyfriend who supports my makeup choices, whether it's a simple concealor and mascara day with a bit of gloss or full on glam with a highlight that can be seen from space. When I ask what colours I should throw on my eyelids that day, he always replies with the most outrageous and bright colours because at the end of the day, makeup is all about self-expression and creativity. That doesn't mean to say he prefers me with a full face as in truth, I think most people appreciate the vulnerability that comes with expressing your bare skin, but he can also appreciate when I want to exaggerate my features and play with products. Don't feel bad for wearing makeup, or not wearing makeup. Throw on that bold lip and blow kisses to those who comment, because I can guarantee that as long as you feel confident, you look amazing. Hi everyone, my name's Laura.
*Group sitting in chairs in a circle echoes "Hi Laura"* And I...am addicted to makeup. In my head, the people sitting around the circle all hang their heads in shared shame as we wallow in our self-pity as the fresh-faced spokesperson reassures us that there is a way out. I envy her clear skin and allow myself to think how wonderful that extra half an hour in bed would be. I do, however, wonder what highlighter the girl next to me is using and debate asking the guy opposite how he got his brows to look so sharp. Such is the life of an addict. Scrolling through Social Media, I'm astounded by the abundance of 'too many politicians on here' status'. This is exactly the kind of attitude that leads to the statistics above, stating an enormous 15.9 million of us boycotted the poll stations on Voting Day.
More people becoming involved in politics is exactly what we need. Regardless of opinion or depth of knowledge, we all have the potential to have a say in our future, so why waste it? Some believe that they know so little about politics that there would be no point in voting. Whilst it is important to understand what you're voting for, it isn't essential to know the ins and outs of every outcome. You don't need to know all of the policies of every party, the individuals involved or even the details of their campaign to have a feel for a party or particular person of interest. It is the fault of our education system for not introducing such ways of thinking earlier on, but it's never too late to have a little read up on a party or even just ask around for general opinions. This post is not to persuade you to vote as I plan on voting or to influence a particular result. But please, whatever you do, do something. #GeneralElection #VDay #Vote It can be so disheartening to realise you've grown too old for things you'd become accustomed to. Going down the slide at the park is now a logistical problem, shopping at Toys R Us no longer feasible and gliding down streets in a pair of Heely's grabs all the wrong kinds of attention. But now I have come to realise I have outgrown something else: a tradition families celebrate each year with a selection of chocolate goods, bunny-themed teddies and an early morning egg hunt. This year, I have concluded that Easter has become a fond memory of childhood and I can't help but feel a little sour at the realisation. I guess it really hit home when my own Mum told me I was 'too old for an Easter egg this year'. I sulked as any other 5 year old would and spat my dummy out of the pram, metaphorically of course. Is it too old to emigrate to Neverland at 22?
I recently read about Leo Howard, a Swansea student who completed his Dissertation in just 36 hours. And got a first. I'll leave a link below if you're interested because I was certainly fascinated. I suppose not all heroes wear capes.
But it got me thinking about Dissertations in general and the overall stigma of dread that is attached to them. Unlike most students, I am actually enjoying putting mine together, although I suppose some would say I took the easy way out. Originally an English Language major minoring in Creative Writing, I found the scientific approach to a subject I only associated creativity and language with unappealing. For my final year, I decided to opt for the Writing Project as opposed to an analytical project involving some aspect of English Language, thus altering my major to Creative Writing. I was hesitant at first as I knew the change in degree would be less respected and acknowledged later on, and I had already endured more modules in Language than Creative Writing in the previous years, but it was the best decision I have ever made. I'm now writing about a topic close to my heart, and I have the freedom to create my own piece as opposed to relying on the findings of linguists and academics. So whilst some may say I took the easy way out, I say I chose the option that was best for me. I guess the moral of the story is to go with your heart instead of selecting a safer option, even if you think it may have benefitted you in the long run, because doing what you love seems to me to be far more important than struggling with a subject you're just not as passionate about. Link: http://thetab.com/uk/brookes/2017/02/22/meet-the-grad-who-did-his-dissertation-in-36-hours-and-he-got-a-first-16519 I always hated the 'new year, new me' attitude. The turning of the clock inspired so many to conjure up resolutions they would swear to live by, although most would inevitably fail before the Christmas decorations were down. As with most self-critical people, I could always think of a million and one flaws I could change in the new year spirit. I could swear less, drink less and maybe not indulge in as much pizza. I could probably be a little less sarcastic and motivate myself to do more uni work, but the fact is a new year was not going to change any of the things that define me. Instead, this year, I agreed to a resolution to simply do what made me happy. Flawed, of course. And certainly impossible to go a whole 365 days without having to wash the dishes, go to work or tidy up, but the sentiment appealed all the same.
And so I logged onto my beloved blog this evening, cringed at most of it, but decided to start over, not in the new year's spirit, but simply because sometimes, the timings of things don't always work in our favour. The diet can't always start on a Monday, resolutions don't always begin on January the first and you can't always give up your cravings at the beginning of the month. Sometimes, it takes something else entirely to make you wake up and realise that life is too short to calorie count and obsess over the past. Sometimes, it's about the here and the now, and starting a fresh. To happiness. I can't stress enough how serious mental illnesses are and just how many people are affected. As someone who is not personally diagnosed with clinical depression, I understand that my views on the matter are limited as there is a lot I don't understand. But to have my sister, and best friend, come crying to me at 2am, telling me she can't carry on, puts everything into perspective. You don't have to suffer from a mental illness yourself to realise that everyone feels low from time to time, but depression is on another level. There are a lot of resources out there to help those dealing with depression, anxiety and the likes, but there are also techniques to help those who are effected on a second-hand basis. Dealing with a loved one who suffers from a mental illness can be a delicate and emotional process. For me, the most difficult thing about living with someone with depression is knowing that I am unable to cure it. Being unable to help is difficult to come to terms with, but the important thing is that there are resources and people available who can make a difference. As adamant as the person may be to not seek out professional help, I strongly urge you to encourage them to. Even persuading them to see a councillor once a week is a step in the right direction. It provides your loved one with someone to talk to without emotional attachment as well as a professional perspective. These people are trained to deal with mental illnesses unlike most family members or friends are, but they also offer an unbiased ear to listen to them without judgement or repercussions. Encouraging your loved one to seek help can be a delicate subject and so the important thing to know is to not enforce it. They are more likely to benefit from counselling or cognitive therapy if they are willing to cooperate. If someone is reluctant to seek help, it shouldn’t be forced upon them as though they are not in control of themselves. It’s important for anyone to make the realisation on their own and when they find that they want to do something about it, trust that they will and support their decision. As a friend or family member, that’s the most anyone can really do. Another way to help is to make plans with your loved one and give them, and yourself, something to look forward to. Spending quality time together not only builds trust and increases the bond between you but encourages the mind to think positively about future prospects. Having something to look forward to in the future may eliminate the possibility of ending the present. It doesn’t have to be anything complex, but even planning a trip to the cinema a week in advance is an important step to planning the future. The most important thing I can say to anyone living with someone with depression is to be supportive and sensitive. Getting mad and abusive is never going to help anyone and is more likely to push your loved one away from you. Making it clear that you are available to talk to without judgement may just make all that difference. For example, when my sister took her second overdose, she called me up to her room and told me straight away what she had done. Her trusting me enough to come to me allowed us to get to the hospital in time to deal with the situation. I’m not saying it’s easy, but you’d rather be in the loop than standing on the outside of an operating room. I’ve always had a close relationship with my sister, although recent events have definitely brought us closer, and I’m thankful to say that she is now working towards controlling her urges and moods. I’d love to know all of your opinions on the matter of mental health and living with someone with depression. Feel free to comment below and thank you for taking the time to read this post. Yesterday, we all came together to celebrate the life of a man I had always assumed would live forever, a man who was always there to tell a tale or crack a joke. A man more in love with his wife than I’ve ever witnessed, even though he had a grumpy way of showing it at times. But despite his grumpy ways, he was always joking around with us, threatening to have Nan sew up the rips in our jeans, and daring us to take a sip of his evening whiskey. I spluttered every time, and he’d laugh, tell us ‘that’s why it’s only for adults’ and pull us in for a big Grandad cuddle.
I always marvelled at his energy, spending endless afternoons with us playing in the garden with that sunny D basketball that never seemed to scuff no matter how hard we threw it, and challenging us to games of swing ball. He was unbeatable in every game, including chess and checkers, and knew every trick in the book, which is why I knew how difficult it was for him to accept he could no longer do the things his younger body enabled him to. But I am sure he’s up there now looking for a dog to walk, a grass to mow or a fruit shoot to drink. I still expect to hear him say he’s been given too much dinner, but insist there’s always room for dessert. I can hear his singing in the kitchen and begging Nan for a bottle of wine with dinner, just cause he fancied it. And despite their comical bickering, I can still see the love they shared, forever acting like teenagers as they pulled tongues at one another or laughed together as they muttered inside jokes. A true example of never giving up, even when the going gets tough, and forever my inspirations. And so tonight, I’ll raise a metaphorical glass of whiskey, cause I still can’t stand the taste, to Douglas Lemon and Lime Thompson, the best Grandad I could have ever wished for. I’ll forever miss and love you Grandad, may you rest in eternal peace. |
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